Jolted into Reality of Makeup Addiction + Project Low/No Buy



Okay, so impulsively buying makeup (or whatever vices you have) is not a new phenomenon, especially if you're a beauty blogger. I started getting into makeup a little bit 3 years ago. But before that, I only had eyeshadow, mascara, some blush and lipstick. I only had a few lipsticks I could count on my hand. I bought my first foundation, MAC Face and Body in December 2012. I didn't really buy much in 2013, maybe just a Benefit product here or there. 2014, I bought my first Naked palette (Naked 3), I started, subscribing to Birchbox and ipsy (I canceled them, but I got ipsy back). Now? I don't even want to count how many lipsticks and glosses I have.

Taken in January this year, before I bought a few more palettes. Aris is not impressed.


Now my collection is massive, and overwhelming. Well, maybe in the beauty world it's not that much. But I'm not Dulce Candy or Jaclyn Hill. Plus, they get paid to do their videos. I'm just an amateur blogger who just started up a year ago. My family doesn't know I have this blog, which is why I haven't been promoting it as much. They don't know that this blog is partially why I have been buying more makeup. I don't want them to know about this blog because I do post some personal stuff.

I guess my love and curiosity for makeup started off from insecurity. I've always worn it since 8th grade, but I just had the basics. I never even heard of the Naked palettes until 2 years ago! Brows? I had thick brows, I didn't need them! But I've always been insecure about my looks. It's better now. But I remember 2 years ago when I had to go back on prednisone because the protein leaked in my kidney. And every "spoonie" (someone with a chronic illness) knows that prednisone alleviates symptoms and makes you feel better, but...you gain weight as a side effect. Around that time, I was really skinny. I was 116 pounds at 5'4", which sounds normal...but everyone was worried about me. I was worried for myself, I don't look or feel good being that thin. All of my pants were loose, not even the belts could help me. (I look and feel best around 125) I was having really high fevers too. I was starting my first semester in the graphic design program, and I was stressed out about the fact that I couldn't drive, and my dad's death was still fresh. All of that culminated into me being on 80 mg of prednisone after my 24th birthday (I was supposed to only start at 40 mg), which stopped the fevers, then came the tapering. I had the biggest and roundest face ever in my life. I was so embarrassed. And I've had that moonface before too.

My 24th birthday in October 2013

New Years Eve 2014 (I'm on the right)

So what does makeup have to do with all of it? Well, learning about contouring to sculpt your face has piqued my interest, especially with my moonface. But when you're at 50–80 mg...it's kinda hopeless. But I loved how makeup made me look and feel, and learning to put on a full face gave me that boost of confidence. I hated how the clothes I loved no longer fit me. I was and still am still hesitant to buy clothes. Last year and this year were the least amount of times I bought clothes. 

That's why I started this blog. To learn more about makeup, to engage in the beauty/fashion community, and to also share my story about having lupus. Makeup was and is a way to make me feel beautiful despite what other people have said about me in the past, and despite the challenges and insecurities I feel about my looks and weight. I weigh 156 now, but thank God, my face has gotten smaller (I'm on 9 mg!) and I am getting more muscle tone from working out. I think my waist has shrunk by 1/8".

My insecurities lead me to my passion for makeup. But I realize it is getting out of hand with the money I am spending. Today, I got a package from NYX and Sephora. My mom took a day off today since she had an interview for her US Citizenship. And she called me out on it. I reminded her that she used to spend $200 on shoes when she was my age. But she was working full time as a flight attendant at the time.

I knew in the back of my head I needed to stop spending since I have a disgusting amount of makeup.  My mom can be a very tough love type of parent, but I needed that, even though I was extremely embarrassed. I used to be more modest when it came to my shopping and grooming choices...

So I guess I'm going to start doing Project Low/No Buy. I am just coming up with these rules for myself, so bear with me. I'll be doing the following:

1. No more lipsticks and lip glosses. That is my favorite product, and I have more than enough.
2. I'll wait for my birthday to get the Urban Decay Naked Smoky Palette.
3. Use my blushes, highlights, contours, eyeshadows, etc. until I hit pan and empty at least one of it.
4. Review products for this blog I bought recently but haven't written about yet.
5. Come up with more creative blog topics besides reviews (ex: dupes, OOTD's, top 5–10 lists, seasonal looks, etc.)
6. Only get skincare products when I run out. Not experimenting since it will break me out anyway.

Does anyone want to do this with me? I've been wanting to do Project Low/No Buy for a while, but since I haven't officially started, it's easier to get sucked in and impulse buy. Has anyone done it? I definitely want and need the accountability. I know that I have a wedding to save up for and I have student loans looming over me. It's always good to save for a rainy day. I know how hard it is to not spend, especially when you're blogging. If anyone has any words of wisdom for me, I would love to hear some advice in the comments! I need help. A lot of it. We are all in this together.

4 comments :

  1. Omg this post is everything! I discovered it and it really hit a note with me. I had recently done a video where I talked about this a little bit, so everything you said really struck a note with me. If you wanted to watch it, here's the link https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sTg6H4pFidU

    But honestly, this is such a great post. Best of luck to you and your challenge!

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    1. I watched your video, and I admire that you had a fun and creative way of doing your makeup challenge in an ipsy bag! I admire your authenticity about it. Because yeah, for me it's like, I'm thinking I'm not gonna buy makeup, next thing you know the new products come out! Thanks for stopping by and making me feel not alone, and that it's not this insurmountable thing :)

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  2. such a great idea, just like you spending too much and owning more than an average person. Defo wanna do Project low/no buy for a while
    http://blushinginlife.blogspot.com

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